Mama's Boy
by bootybertholdt
Summary: Sasuke was getting real tired of this relationship between Sakura and his mom.


I.

If Sasuke would've known that his mom would become best friends with Sakura when he brought her and Naruto to his house five years ago, then he damn well wouldn't have done it. But no, his stupid ass had to finally give in to his teammates' constant whining about how they really, really, _really_ wanted to find out what the Uchiha household was like. Besides, as Naruto so eloquently put, you've both used my bathroom, so now it's my turn to use yours.

When Sasuke asked his mother through gritted teeth whether his annoying as fuck teammates could come for dinner one night this week, he expected his father, who was in the room at the time, to immediately shut the idea down. But no. That damn asshole didn't even open his whore mouth and just kept sipping at his coffee while blankly looking at the paperwork strewn across the kitchen table. Douchebag.

So with literal stars in her eyes, Mikoto gushed and squealed about how she was so happy to have her little Sasu-chan's teammates come for dinner. And then she dashed out the door to get a head start on her planning. She claimed that it was gonna be the best dinner she's ever made.

Two days and a lot of overexcited babbling from Mikoto later, Naruto and Sakura could be found on Sasuke's doorstep, trying to surreptitiously peer through the window to get a glimpse into the mysterious Uchiha house. When Sasuke opened the door to let them in he found them both crouched awkwardly to the side with their hands cupped over their eyes to block out the sun.

"Seriously, guys? My house isn't some experimental lair. Just come in already."

Two steps into the house and that was when Sasuke's peaceful life crashed down around his scrawny twelve years old legs. That was when Uchiha Mikoto first saw Sakura up close and mentally adopted her as the daughter she had always wanted.

"Oh my god! Your hair is the prettiest I've ever seen in my life! You _must_ let me braid it."

Fuck, Sasuke thought, what have I done?

II.

When Sasuke was fourteen and all raging hormones and righteous fury for the world, he would generally get pretty fucking pissed at the smallest of things. Like when Naruto took the last piece of meat when Team Seven was all out eating barbeque? Yeah, Sasuke began imagining all the ways he could possibly murder him. The bloodier, the better.

Or when Naruto arrived at his house on a Saturday morning with Sakura in tow, and proceeded to plop his feet right on top of the coffee table in the living room, subsequently smudging Sasuke's scroll that he had been painstakingly writing on for the past hour. Yeah, let's just say that his mom would've been horrified if she had the power of telepathy.

But when Sasuke turned around to go back into the kitchen before he strangled the Fourth's only son, all of his anger towards Naruto rushed towards a new source. One with pink hair, and bright green eyes, and a really pretty smile.

Haruno Sakura, his fucking teammate, was sitting on a stool in his kitchen and darkly laughing with his mother. Not only that, but they were both staring at him with these weird looks like they knew something that he didn't. It pissed him the fuck off.

Sasuke quickly grabbed an apple from the counter and got the hell out of the kitchen to escape that annoying shit fest. Throwing the apple at the back of Naruto's head, he slipped out the backdoor and hopped over the fence.

III.

At the age of sixteen, Sasuke was happy to say that he had gotten his damn hormones in check and didn't try to tear out every person's throat that looked at him wrong. Regardless, Naruto was still annoying as fuck and deserved a beating at least every day. And Sakura was just getting prettier and prettier, but more annoying with every visit to his house.

See, it wouldn't bother him so much if she had come to see _him._ He would be kinda happy to spend more time with her without the idiot around. But instead of coming to spend time with her actual teammate, Sakura came over at least once a week to talk to his mom.

They would just sit outside for hours, with teas in their hands and giant books in their laps. At first, Sasuke had thought that they had started some dumb ass book club for two, but then as he was walking into the house one day, he heard Sakura cooing over something.

Walking over to where the two women were sitting, he raised an eyebrow and asked, "What the hell are you guys looking at?"

"Sasu-dear, language."

"Sorry," Sasuke let out in a gruff mumble.

Tossing her bright hair back behind her shoulder, Sakura beamed up at him as she showed him the book. "We're looking at your baby pictures, Sasuke-kun! Look at how cute you were!"

Sasuke's dark eyes instantly narrowed into a glare and he swiftly turned his head. "Mother, can you not show her shit like that?"

"Sasu-chan, watch your language!"

"Fuck."

IV.

At eighteen, Sasuke learned how to deal with Sakura's friendship with his mom.

Jumping away from Sasuke's tense body, Sakura exclaimed, "You totally cheated in that last round! What the hell, Sasuke?"

Smirking as he flash stepped towards her, Sasuke raised his hand to brush a strand piece of hair from her face.

"Are you gonna tell my mom on me?"

"I might! That was such a sneaky asshole move and you know it!" Sakura puffed out her cheeks in annoyance, eyes hardening into a glare.

Letting out a soft chuckle, Sasuke put his hands against her cheeks and pushed the air out. Dipping his head down, he caught her lips with his own and gently pressed down.

Pulling away from her, Sasuke, with a glimmer in his eyes, smirked and asked, "Are you gonna tell my mom about that too?"

"M-maybe, you asshole," Sakura faintly said, cheeks stained red.

"I don't think she'll be all too concerned," he replied before pressing his lips back onto hers.

* * *

Notes: Hello everyone. This one-shot was a product of a conversation I had with Les concerning Sasuke's feelings about Sakura being best buds with his mom. I hope you all liked it, and I just want to let any of you that reads Revolving Doors know that I am starting the next chapter. The semester is finally ending and everything is going crazy, so that's why I've been MIA.


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